Why I Should Not Stay Awake Past 3 AM

What do you want to be when you grow up?

Emotionless

It's not because I'm sad, but because it's too complex

Yeah, it has it's pros, but to me it's just to much stress

To express

To be there for others

And wanting them to be there for me

The wanting of being forever

And to reconcile with myself

That it's not going to be

'Cause we're not kids anymore

Or are we?

I don't know

But our fairy tales have lower standards

They've gone from killing dragons

To simply being together

Forever

And even these ones

We can't believe

I want to grow older and never like someone

The way I like you

Not even you

The word here is purposely ambiguous

Unaccounting the number of figures

In the reflexion of this song-mirror

That might show your face

If you care enough to look at it

I wished I could focus my energy

In something of more significance

And treat this with indifference

And be glad of my ignorance

In the matters

Of the others

It's not that anyone has hurt me

But that to me it's harder than it should be

Or than you make it look like

Because with me it just doesn't feel right

To me this whole thing is draining

It doesn't come naturally

It requires training

A complex exercise

Of mind bending

That's too much work for the payoff

Sometimes I even need a day off

But what I really want

Is to quit this job

Sadly, it's not that easy

I'd like retirement, no doubt about it

But, like other low paying jobs

I'm at it because I can't keep without it

Because low salary

Is still salary

And not being lonely

Has it's price

Dichotomy is a bitch

And my brain is just a mess

So sometimes I wish

I was emotionless